I really don’t know how to say this so I’m just going to dive into it.
This weekend I spent a lot of time with my boyfriend and his friends at his new school for the first time ever. Most of my boyfriends friends are girls, which I try not to let bother me, but being a female, it is very hard not to become jealous of other females. Especially when I am two-and-a-half hours away from my boyfriend and they are a drive away. Especially when I see him on weekends and they see him five days a week.
But girls and guys can be friends, right? Heck, the people in my group of friends are mostly guys. I don’t like any of them in a romantic way. They are like brothers to me. I am here for them, I would hope that they would be there for me, but I don’t think I would like to kiss any of them.
Then again, I do not see my group of friends hardly ever at all anymore. None of them have confessed their undying love for me yet, and we don’t talk a whole lot so there is no one-sided flirting.
I basically have no friends. Wow.
I have heard stories over a course of time of my boyfriends female friends and have made little mental notes of their actions and have made assumptions that some of these girls have a crush on my boyfriend. Who wouldn’t? He’s great. I have shared these assumptions with my boyfriend and he declines that any of them have a “thing” for him. They’re just friends. I trust him, but I don’t throw the mental notes away.
This weekend I discovered that there are at least two girls, for sure, who have a thing for my boyfriend and I really don’t know how to feel. I trust my boyfriend and I don’t think he would cheat on me. He’s a really nice guy and has more respect than anything like that. The fact that there are some girls in his group of friends that have a “thing” for him, who see him five days a week, who sit at lunch with him, and who live nearby gives me this incredibly unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach. The fact that someone told him that they like him insults me much more than it should. She knows I exist and I feel as though it is pretty inconsiderate of her.
My boyfriend is torn, too, because of all of this. He was upset earlier in the school year because he would sit by himself at lunch, but now he is forming a social life, only to find out that he is one fine, irresistible piece of man candy and that all of the babes want him. He wants to keep this girl, who confessed her liking of him, as a friend but is afraid it will be weird. It will be weird. I know from experience. I feel as though no matter what he chooses to do in the situation, someone will be hurt, whether it be me, her, or both of us.
I am consumed with the thought of the girl and I don’t know how to deal with the situation. It is heightening my anxiety. I wish things weren’t so complicated.