It is time to admit some things that are difficult for me to talk about.
A few months ago, while I was in school, I was nervously touching my face when I noticed a bump on my jaw line. It didn’t hurt but I figured it shouldn’t be there after comparing one side of my face to the other. Even though I discovered the bump late at night, I texted my mom that there was a tumor in my face.
The next day, my mom didn’t respond to my text because she assumed that my overdramatic-self was referring to an acne flare up. I told her about the tumor once more, she visited me to check it out, and since then we have been investigating this “thing.”
We went to my orthodontist to look at x-rays. The x-rays were very simple and lacked a lot of detail and were taken around the time that I was 12. You could see my “thing” starting to grow almost eight years ago. Crazy! My doctor ordered another x-ray to see what the “thing” was. When I went in for my appointment they didn’t take me seriously at first, thinking that I had a swollen lymph node or a minor cyst. After my x-ray they told me that I had extra bone growing out of my jaw. There wasn’t much to worry about, but I could get a second opinion on it.
So I was referred to an ear, nose, and throat doctor.
The ear, nose, and throat doctor couldn’t do much for me. The jaw didn’t seem to be part of his specialty. He felt my face for a bit and told us he was going to order a CT scan because it’s more detailed and it will help them see if it’s actually bone or a cyst. He really seemed convinced that there was a cyst in my face or a bone spur.
I had the CT scan about a week ago. They did the contrast dye and everything. I was sure everything was going to be okay and that I would be able to get out of a potential surgery (I’ve already had two surgeries and an endoscope.) But I received the results of my CT scan on Thursday and it’s not looking great.
The ear, nose, and throat doctor said that the “thing” in my face is soft tissue and not part of my jaw, just on my jaw. He suspects a calcified lymph node but he really has no idea what it is and really seems to want it removed from my body. On the CT scan they also found an “abnormality” in my lung. The ear, nose, and throat doctor would like to have a follow-up CT scan on my lung to make sure it’s okay. The huge bummer is the lung “thing.” I don’t smoke or anything.
To make matters worse, I have already had surgery for abnormally large and more permanent cysts on my ovaries (both of them.) It seems that, no matter how well I eat and how much I exercise, my body just really loves producing unnecessary crap. I can’t help but let it get me down!
Right now everything is quite the cluster. Although the ear, nose, and throat doctor wants things a certain way, my regular doctor seems far less concerned. She would rather have a biopsy of the soft tissue, first, before doing a pretty invasive surgery. And, if the biopsy of my jaw comes back normal, to not have another CT scan to check my lung to avoid unnecessary radiation. I have been referred to see an oral surgeon, who wants to look at all of my x-rays and CT scans before he considers doing anything with my face.
A very unpleasant and scary situation.
I am feeling “done.” I can’t seem to catch a break. No matter my efforts, there always seems to be something. Why does my body have to be an over achiever and make these weird things? I have had three, now, and I am only nineteen.